The POTW: Verse Til It Hurts


POTW #852
(Week of 22 September, 2013)

Spurred by an article my dad sent me about an insect that has naturally-occurring mesh gears in its legs, but informed mostly by my own long-standing desire to cheat death by becoming a cyborg before I succumb to aging and disease.

Cyborg Me

Some maladjustment causes the allergies I have experienced all of my life
And there isn't a dial or screw I can turn that will balance the factors and make it all right
My feet are afflicted with bone spurs, high arches, arthritis, and once in a while with the gout
Unfortunately, I am stuck with these dogs; there's no aftermarket for swapping them out

My eyes have high mileage, they're losing their range like an old, over-utilized piece of elastic
How nice it would be to replace them with fresh ones of good pharmaceutical durable plastic
If only there was a thing to be done to improve the state of my bothersome sinuses
And all of these other debilitating or simply annoying unfixable minuses

Repairs and maintenance, obvious downsides of being a hundred percent organic
But someday, when I am a cyborg, these problems will fall in the textbook of basic mechanics
And of course there will also be room for enhancements, the possible upgrades and customization
Limited only by vision, and battery power, and maybe the rate of inflation

I'd like to add a GPS directly to my frontal lobe
I'm always getting lost and this would help me navigate the globe
An extra pair of arms or two would also come in mighty handy
With built-in tools like drills and saws and pliers and a jug of brandy

A set of wheels, retractable, inside my new metallic feet
Effective air conditioning and corresponding central heat
Telescoping tripod legs so I can reach the highest shelf
Onboard space for nuts and bolts in case I must repair myself

A bit of extra memory would be a welcome brain expansion
To turn my shoddy mental shack into a sprawling mental mansion
With options to selectively move certain data to the trash
And automatic backups so I'm safe in case of system crash

Technology is evolution as the future is unfurled
I'm looking forward to tomorrow and my life in cyborg world
Some would say these changes will dilute one's core humanity
But being made of meat is not so great, so why the vanity?

Copyright © 2013 by Dave Grossman

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